How to Find Your Upgrade Style

Everyone has an upgrade style, they just don't know it.

It’s not definable like a decorating style that’s categorized by looks (modern, farmhouse, eclectic). It’s closer to a personal style. The way you put things together that make it yours. It changes, there’s a flow to it. Most importantly, it looks different for each person.

Upgrades have nothing to do with how much you spend & everything to do with what they make you feel.

When I moved back to Minnesota after the whole life I had planned for myself fell apart, it was the first time in 20 years I only had myself to think about. I had spent years sacrificing & changing what I wanted to accommodate someone else.

There was no room for settling any more, it was time to upgrade.

After feeling like I lost everything, I needed stability, comfort, & security.

I was fortunate enough to have time to find a home that felt like "me." I always wanted something with character & this old house has plenty. A big kitchen so I had room to cook. Beautiful wood floors that slant a different direction in each room. A ton of windows that fill my home with light and make the house feel breezy in the summer. I knew from the moment I stepped inside...This was My House (comfort & security).

After my first winter back, I had an automatic start put in my car. A $200 investment has made such a huge upgrade in my life. No more running outside to start my car in the middle of getting ready or sitting in a freezing car waiting for it to warm up (comfort). I also got a furry steering wheel cover (my fingers freeze immediately from when I was young & stupid and got frost bit because warm gloves weren't cute).

I got a job doing night audit for a boutique hotel. It was a stress free job that gave me plenty of down-time to read & to figure out what was next. I eventually used the time to work on my business and finish some courses I bought & never completed. Plus it was a steady paycheck(stability).

For me upgrades have nothing to do with designer labels (no judgement if that's your thing, it's just not mine). My upgrades are natural candles, kitchen stuff, massages, time to cook, soft blankets and pillows to make things cozy (It's all about textures), & my custom perfume.


This is how to find your upgrade style in 5 steps.

1. Forget everything you've been told about upgrades.
2. Pick 3 things you want your life to make you feel. My 3 things currently are Abundant, Special, & Secure.
3. What are the characteristics of the things that give you each feeling? Think of what you already have that gives you that feeling. What do they have in common?
4. Make a top 10 list of things that bug you or make you feel the opposite of the feelings you chose in step 2.
5. Get creative. What would fix the thing that bugs you or give you a feeling from step 2?

Five steps and ta-dah your personal upgrade style.

When I moved back to Minnesota I needed stability, comfort & security. Now I want a life that feels abundant, special & secure (step 2).

Abundant for me is about textures, good quality products, things that make my life easier (step 3).

I despise dusting & deep cleaning. Plus I stay busy and I’d rather not have my free time sucked up because the house needs to be cleaned. I like to curl up on the couch or chair with blankets to feel cozy on cold days. Massages are possibly my favorite thing in the world & a great way to relax. I had been promising myself I would get regular massages for years (step 4)

My abundant upgrades are cozy blankets, fuzzy socks, good quality candles, quality cookware, getting monthly massages, soft absorbent towels, good sheets, spending time with my friends every Friday, having a cleaner (step 5).


Special is represented by custom, early release, or limited availability.
My special upgrades are my perfume (designed specifically for me), my hair products, preordering products off of kickstarter, investing in companies on Wefunder, and tickets or invites to special events(not much of this in 2020. Thanks COVID).


Secure is represented by dependable and safe.
My secure upgrades are my front door camera, building my savings account, the autostart in my car, the neighborhood I live in, my website hosting company.

Don't feel like you have to upgrade everything at once (that's overwhelming) or that you have to stick to your original list (flow). Choose 1-3 things and make them part of your life. Then move on to the next when you're ready.